Stupid Questions

I really want to believe that there are no stupid questions.  And deep down I do believe that.  But I have a high intolerance for ones that seem dumb to me.  I recognize this as being my problem most of the time.  It get annoyed when people ask me the same question several times. 

I've kind of learned that most people have a worse memory for things people tell them than I do. Some of you tell me the same stories over and over again and sometimes I stop you and tell you that I've already heard them.  Sometimes I find myself telling the same story to you, but when I ask you if you've heard it, you say, "no."  I remember what you should have remembered.  I think this skill helped me a lot in college when lectures are rarely repeated.  I was a person who really needed to go to lecture to absorb the information. 

I don't know if I would be a good teacher because of this issue I have. 

Anyway, this issue is transferring to other parents.  I have come to the conclusion that I am a very relaxed parent and that this is unique.  I pretty much never ask questions on any of the parenting sites and web lists I'm a part of.  Mostly because I don't want an answer from a random person.  I also rarely have questions.  I figure things are going well an when they don't, they don't last long. 

But a lot of people ask what I unfairly call stupid questions on these lists.  Questions like, "why isn't my 4 month old sleeping all night?" And, "I have a headache, is there anything I can take that's safe while breastfeeding?" (for those of you out of the loop, almost all drugs are considered safe) 

I usually skip over these.  I think to myself about how messed up the world is that people are still wondering these things.  I get judgmental.  I just want the world to take a big, deep breath and try to enjoy their lives.

But recently I started really paying attention to some of the responses and some of the mother's responses to the advice given and I've realized something.  Most of the time these parents are just wanting support.  They have come to the end of their rope and are wondering if something has gone terribly wrong and then they ask what I think is a dumb question and the responses people give usually get them back on track.  And then the parents usually thank everyone for their support and tell everyone that they feel better. 

And, I'm not different, I just do it less than others and in different contexts.  For instance, I had no pain with breastfeeding for months and then all of a sudden it was hurting again, not a lot, but definitely hurting and I had some red spots from how he was latching.  So I asked the people at my nursing mom's support group and they told me that this happens sometimes and that it's usually while they are teething.  And sure enough, a few days later he got his first tooth and the pain went away. 

I also have needed support in this way for EC, because almost no one does EC.  So I often tell people I know who do it that we had a rough few days and they tell me that this is normal and it brings me back to reality. 

So, I've tried to shift my mindset from thinking that parents are stupid and asking stupid question to the fact that parents lack support and it makes them sometimes forget simple things and it makes them sometimes worry about little things that don't matter or will resolve themselves. 

I'm currently dealing with laryngitis that has now gone a whole five days and I just asked on facebook today, "when will I get my voice back?!"  I feel desperate, I've never had my voice so screwed up for so long. I hate it.  I just need someone to say, "I once had laryngitis for 6 days and then it went away and I got my normal voice back."  I know that this is probably the case, I KNOW my voice is not gone forever, but I just need someone to give me a little support and tell me what I already know.  So is that a stupid question?