Wait and see has been our motto lately. The pregnancy is getting boring, which is a good thing, because it means everything is going well. The fetus is growing at a normal rate and mommy feels fine besides an extreme increase in heartburn.
And the rest of our lives are kind of on hold too. Mostly on the employment side. I'm trying to switch to part-time at my work after the birth, but unsure if they will find a part-time spot for me, which may mean trying to find a new job, or going completely broke. They tell me they will figure it out in Spring, but I don't think I should ask again on March 21st. Probably early May if I haven't heard anything. I really didn't think it would be this hard.
And Brent has a possibility of getting a promotion, and a possibility of unionizing his job and getting more involved in union work, or finding a new job too. Who the hell knows what will happen, but basically, both of our jobs are probably going to change somehow. They might still be with the same company, but it will be different.
So, we've been putting off looking for childcare for a while. Chances are we wouldn't need it until August sometime. And there's some chance we won't need it at all. That would be ideal for a while, we'd be working opposite shifts, but we've done that before, and we'd be able to save money.
Since we're crazy, hippy, commie people who want to breastfeed, skip the diapers, and eventually feed junior the same food we eat, I don't think baby will cost us that much the first couple years, outside of the birth itself and any other medical bills. Skipping daycare costs would fit in nicely with all of this. Plus I like the idea of having mom and dad alone with baby for a while each week. Mom gets to bond and dad gets to bond. Preferably I'd like baby to spend time with people it's going to know through it's life when neither of us can be with baby, like relatives, friends, and comrades. I never felt like I got to know my relatives very well when I was growing up. I want, like, a village of people around the baby. But people who will have meaningful, long-term friendships with the kid. Other adults this one can go to when mommy and daddy have gone insane and are no help to it.
But who are these people? My guess is they will crop up along the way. Some friends will stay close, others will drift off because we "have become lame ever since the baby was born." But I really hope a few outside of me and Brent fall in love with our baby. The resiliency of children increases when they have more adults who care about them. What if we both die? Right now I can't think of one person I'd feel really confident about leaving my child with. We have to figure this out, but it probably won't happen before the birth.
At times like this I really wish I had a sibling who I was close with who I knew would raise my kid well if I died, but right now, I have no one who fits the bill. Anyone I can think of, I don't know very well, and I have close friends who I know will be involved, but not any with children.
AH! Now I'm getting creeped out. I know it's unlikely that both Brent and I would die, but you have to plan for that, and I just can't even begin.
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